“Who’s the commencement speaker?” I asked my wife on the
way to my granddaughter’s preschool graduation. She smiled and rolled her eyes.
It made me think that if I get asked when Talia graduates from kindergarten, I had
better be ready.
I imagined myself taking the podium, looking over the
crowd, and seeing the happy family members half smiling back. In my mind I
place my papers down, look up, and begin in an uplifting manner.
Good evening parents… grandparents… family and friends…
and especially you, our graduates. Congratulations, you have reached this joyous
occasion through long grueling days of Play-Doh, paste, and Playground. You
have every right to be proud of yourself.
Months ago you timidly climbed the steps to the slide, nervously
moved on to the greater heights of the monkey bars, then proudly reached, ever
so higher to the tippy top of the castle, taking your blankey to places that
were literally, and I mean literally, out of reach just years before.
As you looked out over the school yard you thought,
shucks, I’d rather be home playing X-Box, but through your perseverance you unwittingly
formed a foundation, a foundation for a new you and new way of thinking. You
now know, everything is not yours, the tags on your clothes go to the back, and
crying only sometimes helps because adults can still use force when no one’s
looking.
You see, Graduates, your parents are thinkers, go
getters. With their sense of responsibility they smartly opened up their
wallets so you can get a head start on learning life’s rules. The rules that
your teachers, through clinched teeth taught, “Keep your hands to yourself,” “Play
fair,” and “Don’t run with that stick.” And now, the rule you’re just about to
figure out on your own, “Having a little bit of money can’t hurt.”
Now, Graduates, I’d like to speak to your parents for a
moment for they are about to live for the first time, or possibly relive an
excursion into mandatory school life.
Parents… look at your little darlings up here in their
cute little caps and gowns, smiling back, some with their hats too low to their
eyes, waving at you with complete abandon because they don’t care where they
are. They’re perfect little angels aren’t they? It’s the same way they act with
you at home isn’t it?
They notice you and the love they have for you makes them
react, to tell you they love you.
They say it by waving proudly, calling, “Hey Mom!”, or “Hey Dad!” They want
you to see them. They feel safe when they know you’re watching. Take a look…Now,
look around you…Now, feel this building and the presence of others who have
children here. Older brothers and sisters, grandparents, aunts and uncles,
remember that you are here, too. Thank you for taking part in your family’s history and
when these new personalities started to form. You are here for them, as fate gently
pushes them into the game of life.
Soon, they will be asked to play.
Some will play first string. Others will have to work
harder and develop skills that are unique to the team. But all will
participate.
Although, he or she won’t always know exactly what
position is best for them, you should
use your expertise to nudge them into the direction you want. And, there will
come a time when they have to decide on their own. Support that decision.
Of course you have some time. Right now all they want to
be is Princesses, Ninja Turtles, and Santa. I heard the other day about a
little girl who said when she grows up; she wants to be a twin.
They will grow up and as they do, love them with all your
heart.
Sadly, my mother wasn’t lucky. She had a son who wouldn’t shut
up.
“Yes, Larry,” she would tiredly say. “What is it now,
Larry,” she moaned. “We don’t have a Teddy Bear, Larry”… “Larry, here, sleep
with this rubber chicken.”
But she took me to shows and voice lessons, piano lessons
and guitar lessons until I figured out my path. She was right. It was in the
arts.
In a book I wrote I delve into how people take different
paths for success, the twists and turns and the forks in the road one navigates
to move forward, to mature, and to prosper. I’ve found I’m at my weakest when I
leave the arts to find my fortune. I write “The only luxury I’ve never been
afforded was the luxury of having luxury.” Money isn’t everything. Happiness in
your heart is success.
These kids in the
next few years will be finding out things about their young selves that will
direct them toward being a happier child and to things that are challenging
that will test their inner strength. Let them know once again that the game of
life doesn’t always play by the rules. Once again, love them with all your
heart and they will learn through your example.
I beg you to take your child places and when there, explain
what’s all around them. If all you have time and money for is to take them for
a simple walk downtown. There is a whole lot of history you can tell them
about. Take them to see the ducks, festivals, or fishing on the side the road.
Just take them. Time waits for no one.
In closing, I’d like to do the parents a favor and give the
graduates some tips to take through the next year. It might stick. I figured
I’d try.
Kids… when you’re at the LSU
Football game and everyone is yelling, Charge! Charge! Charge! Do not look up
at daddy and say, “You know that’s how mommy got the new furniture after I
heard you say not to.”
Kids, when the family is over
at Christmas and your grandfather smiles for the pictures, do not yell out,
“Gee, Paw Paw the tooth fairly must have given you a lot of money. You don’t
have any teeth.”
Kids, when in the store at
the checkout counter, do not tell the clerk, “I’m only getting this present
because daddy says it will shut me up.”
And, kids, when your family
has guests over and one mentions you have a lovely couch, do not ever say, "We
know, that’s because daddy ends up sleeping there a lot.”
Thank you and remember, life for
you and your family starts right here, in your heart.
