Saturday, August 7, 2010

Hi, Drama. Let’s get in a Blogfest/Giveaway.

I usually go for the joke but this week, all laughing aside. This wasn’t my young life. When I was a teenager I couldn’t get laid in a monkey whorehouse with a pound of bananas. I did have a first cousin who made a dumb decision and do remember the After School Specials.



The pounding on the door awoke Becky Rolland. It was the loose glass actually, that higher pitched rat-a-tat making that distinctive noise in an old house to create urgency. With her husband next to her, children came to mind. “Christ, what now?”
Slipping out of bed she went to the front, peered out the curtain and on the porch was Katie, the seventeen year old and her boyfriend, her daughter’s first love, the guy who says exactly what a young girl wants to hear.
“Mom, let me in! We gotta to talk!”
“My little girl is pregnant,” raced through her mind.
Becky opened the door and allowed them to enter. Dressed in her robe she tied the belt tighter and pulled the chain on the lamp. The young couple took a seat on the sofa and Becky, uneasy, sat on the edge of the chair a few feet away. Katie explained.
“Mom, I haven’t been truthful. Please don’t be mad. Cade is going to get arrested if you don’t say he lives here.”
“Um, run that by me again.”
“I know. I know. We lied. He’s been in trouble and he is older than twenty.”
“Damn it, Katie."
“Please, Mom. I need your help. He got his girlfriend pregnant when she was sixteen, but he was only twenty then and they were in love.”
“Wait. Wait. Hang on a second. He did what?”
“He got his girlfriend pregnant and went to jail but he didn’t register when he got out.”
“When was this?”
“Three years ago.”
Becky's eyes traveled to the skinny, wormy, undeveloped piece of crap and imagined grabbing him by the throat, pushing forward and crushing the back of his skull against the wall behind the sofa, but the question came to mind.
“Are you pregnant?”
“No. I’m not pregnant. I’m smarter than that.”
“Katie, you were sixteen last week.”
“But Mom, I love him.”
“And, I love your daughter, too.”
Becky glared at Cade and felt her hands clinch but Katie interrupted.
“Look Mom, I know what you’re thinking. We didn’t have sex till after I made seventeen. I promise.”
“That’s supposed to make me feel better?”
“That’s true, Miss Rolland. She wanted me to, but I made her wait.”
Becky looked at Cade with a piercing contempt that rattled him, “I suggest you not say a word and get out of my house. Katie, you stay right there. I’m not finished with you, yet.”
Cade immediately got up to leave and looked back. “You coming?”
“Mom, I knew you wouldn’t understand!”
“Honey, this guy didn’t learn his lesson. He met you at sixteen. You’re in high school. He’s twenty-three. He shouldn’t even be near a school.”
“He doesn’t molest little kids, mom!”
“No, he molests big kids!”
“I love him and I’m going to help him! I don’t care what you say.” Katie got up and opened the door. “He’s good to me!”
“But he’s not good for you!”
“Why do you want to be this way? Look… There’s more... I’ll just tell you the rest, later.”


To read others in the High Drama Blogfest:

http://dlcruisingaltitude.blogspot.com/2010/07/high-drama-blogfestgiveaway.html


To read my work in this months POV Magazine:
http://www.povhouma.com/Articles/2010/08_August/ov_03_0810.html

12 comments:

  1. This is HIGH DRAMA indeed and every parent's worst nightmare!! You did an excellent job here branching out from your comfort zone, humor, and I commend you for it! Great job.

    Thanks for taking part today!

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  2. Very believable - I felt like I was right there, watching it all unfold! Great entry! :-)

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  3. This was a good read. I hope you intend to take this a bit further to see how it plays out. Thanks for posting!

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  4. Thanks for posting this. I would have enjoyed it more if it didn't reminded me of a conversation I had with my own daughter a few years ago.

    Great job.

    I'm following your blog.

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  5. ...you've got a talent for dialogue, my friend.
    nicely done:)

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  6. The authenticity in this piece was superb. You have a real gift crafting believable dialog. Great job!

    You have a great blog; I look forward to following and reading more!

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  7. Oh as the mother of a teen girl this made me break out in a cold sweat...

    and after school specials- LOL. Oh, the memories.

    Great entry for the fest!

    bru

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  8. oh my goodness! the line “No, he molests big kids!” was SO awesome! love your humor!
    a breath of fresh air, this one was!

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  9. This is one of my favorite blogfest entries so far! Your dialogue flows well and is wholly believable. Great job!

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  10. Wait, there's more? What a cliffhanger! Very high drama--well done! I agree, I loved the line, "he molests big kids!"

    —Portia

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  11. Look at all your followers, Larry! I feel a bit like a proud Mama (yes, I'm taking credit for a few of the people here, even if I had nothing to do with it. ;)

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  12. Thanks to everyone for the nice words. This was a longer piece that went down to 497 words, then I added a few more when DL gave the go ahead. Chapter II begins when she was 9 years old. I'm that husband who was sleeping, and starts to explain why someone would do this. Thanks again for the very nice things. My experience is plays. When can there be too much dialogue or not enough narrative? Do you just know?

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